05 May 2010

Wearing Nanny's Charms - Feeling the Love from my Ancestors

I'm wearing Nanny's charms right now. I wear them a lot when I need support, like finals week. I think it's funny that Poppy died before I was even born, and I've felt him close by since even before my first memory (as my parents have told me) and yet Nanny always felt so far away after she died. I remember being given her cross at the luncheon after her funeral and even sort of understanding why it went to me, out of everybody, but I can't remember why I got the charm with her anniversary date or her carousel charm, nor what her other charms were, or who has them. I thought there was one for every grandkid, though if there was one representing me, I don't have.

I say, the anniversary charm is to remind me of the love and enduring partnership I will have, and the carousel is a blessing to only do a job that I love. So maybe she doesn't feel so far after all...

Who have you lost?  Do you still talk to them?  Do they still come to you in dreams?  I feel like everyone I've ever loved who has died still continues to shape who I am and who I become.  Their wisdom and love endures.


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